• Child: Dear God will mommy get better?
• God: THERE'S A LINK TO MY FAQ PAGE ON MY BLOG READ IT BEFORE YOU ASK ME THINGS PLS THX <3

i said i was only going online for 10 minutes. its been 5 years.

say-shell:

thefunniestpost:

heyfunniest:

my life is complete

Hysterical!

#NO THEFUNNIESTPOST DOT TUMBLR DOT COM #THIS IS NOT HYSTERICAL #THIS IS HOW A MOTHERFUCKING FAN WORKS #THERE IS NOTHING HYSTERICAL ABOUT MECHANICAL ENGINEERING FUCKNUGGET 

trisarahdactyl:

michaelceratops:

osointricate:

I wonder what President Lincoln would think about there being a movie about him killing vampires. 

“whats a movie”

#’fuck you im not going into another theater’